This post contains a trigger warning regarding pregnancy loss.
My first mummy I am speaking to is my good friend Keeley; first time mum from Perth, living with her wife, new bub and two puppies.
Hello lovely Keeley and thank you talking with me! Could you please share your age and what current stage of motherhood you are in?
Hi! I’m 30 years old, almost 31. I had my 30th birthday while in my early stages of pregnancy. I’ve just come out of the fourth trimester with my little love who’s 14 weeks.
That’s so exciting! The fourth trimester really is tough.
So before baby, what did life look like? What were your goals and how did you view yourself?
My life was good! (It still is); I worked as a nurse, I have a great wife and two fur babies and I enjoyed traveling a lot before COVID hit. In terms of life goals, I honestly did not have a lot of goals, I just really wanted to get married and start a family and be happy, which I am! My life before having my baby became quite consumed with trying to conceive. We tried for over three years before finally getting our little girl.
I am so happy for you and being able to conceive your perfect little baby girl! The trying to conceive part is so daunting and can be a very emotional time for a lot of couples and people.
Would you mind sharing your pregnancy journey and how you viewed your new changing body?
My pregnancy was pretty good! The first 16 weeks were hard for a couple reasons; one being the constant nausea and vomiting, I threw up 1-5 times a day, the second being that I had a previous loss at 16 weeks, so making it to that milestone was pretty intense, in fact the whole pregnancy I was pretty nervous for another loss, it was always in the back of my mind, but I did still enjoy it and didn’t let the fear consume me too much. I was pretty lucky in that I didn’t have a huge bump so I was never too uncomfortable to sleep; I did obviously have some pregnancy discomforts, but not as bad as I hear some people have it, so I can’t complain. I think the best thing was that baby bump and as soon as I started showing I loved it so much & as it got bigger I loved it more. The worst thing would have to be the coccyx pain, which sucked a lot!
The coccyx pain is next level and something I had never heard of before pregnancy. I am so sorry for your loss mumma, no human should have to endure a loss and I can’t even begin to imagine what that would have been like for you reaching 16 weeks. You’re a strong mumma and you should be so proud of yourself!
If you feel like sharing, how was your birth experience?
My birth was good! I was induced the day before my due date. Induction wasn’t what I expected, in that I was told to prepare for it to take all day and night and possibly end up needing my waters broken the next day, so I was mentally ready for a marathon of a labour. As it turned out, little miss was pretty ready to come earth side, because it only took 6 hours from the gel application (a hormone gel inserted behind the cervix to induce labour) to her making her entrance into the world!
Contractions basically started right away and didn’t stop! It was intense ha-ha. I used the gas for just over half of the labour and then they put up an epidural literally right at the end of labour. They didn’t even check how dilated I was! The epidural didn’t even kick in until I was about halfway through pushing; I’m pretty mad about that, because if I had known I was fully dilated and she was coming I may not have bothered with the epidural and just stuck it out. We needed to get bub out pretty quickly as I had meconium in my waters (bubs did a poo inside), so the team had to vacuum her out. As soon as she was out, they chucked her on my chest and I finally met the little girl I had been baking for 9 months. It was love at first sight.
Nice and quick! Excuse the tears coming from my head! I love a happy ending.
Post having bubs, how has life changed?
I guess it’s just the typical things that change for everyone. It’s not just you anymore, every move you make you need to think about this small human. You can’t just duck to the shop to grab something; you need to pack this little thing with you. You can’t just go and pee when you like, you need to set the baby down somewhere safely so you can go to the toilet et cetera. It is all an adjustment that every mother has really. I don’t particularly think there has been much that has changed for me that hasn’t for every other mother out there ha-ha. Maybe that I used to be pretty into binge watching TV and movies in my down time, and now I obviously can’t do that because I have a small human to play with and look after. If I do watch a movie it’ll be during naps and it’ll take me all day to finish one ha-ha. I also used to love my sleep and naps! They no longer occur, but it’s for the best reason ever, so I’m okay with that.
But real talk is, some times you HAVE to take the baby in to the toilet with you…. guilty! I feel you in regards to movies! It took me three days to watch The Grinch the other day, but I made my daughter watch it with me…guilty again!
Bodies change during pregnancy, but post birth has your body changed? If so how do you feel about it?
I am definitely bigger since pregnancy and birth. I’m not going to lie; I do struggle with it. Body image is something I have struggled with since I was about 15. Don’t get me wrong, I love my body and what it accomplished (it grew a whole human!!) and I’m not beating myself up over the fact I’m not thinner anymore. I appreciate my body; I’m just not happy with how it looks right now. I’m also not rushing into making it look smaller either. I’m taking the time to be with my bubba and I’ll work on my body slowly.
I think you look amazing and I don’t think you need to “work on your body”. You did something amazing and you should be so proud.
How do you look after yourself day to day?
My partner works away for 2 weeks and is home for one week, so I don’t get a lot of time to myself when she is away, but I’m completely okay with that! I love my time with my little love! When my partner is home, I make sure I take an extra long shower and I try to squeeze in a nap (often doesn’t happen because I’m too busy thinking about what my family is doing). I like to get eyelash extensions every second time my wife is home, that’s my little break away, and something that makes me feel good about myself. During the weeks my partner is away at work, I make the effort to get out of the house and see friends and family as much as I can.
You’re a super woman for being able to look after a baby on your own for two weeks at a time! Thank you so much for answering my questions!
Do you have any tips for self-care for anyone reading or any new mums out there?
Just making sure you try and get some time to yourself when bub is asleep. I know all you want do is clean the house and get things done, I’m the worst for this too! But I dedicate at least one of bubs naps to just sit down and watch an episode or two of whatever show I’m watching. I also make sure I shower every single day. I know in those early weeks sometimes it seems impossible and I’ve heard some mums say they haven’t showered for days, but it makes me feel human and I like feeling as though I can just stand in shower and wash away anything that upset me or made me mad that day; I just like feeling clean and if I had a really bad day, sometimes the shower is a good place to cry (luckily I have only done this once or twice). Showering is a must for me. I get my eyelashes done every few weeks, and I’ve made sure I’ve kept that up and didn’t stop doing it just because I have a baby now.
If this post has triggered you in anyway, please see the “where to get help” page above or contact me directly.
Thanks for reading! the interviewing part of this blog is a work in progress, so bare with me as I tweak and work towards figuring it all out 🙂
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